We joined the YMCA last night. it is time to get my body in shape, as b-ball at Clear Creek looms...

S and S--what is your specific unload time? I am so very willing to help out.

Fridays make me happy, especially when my sis, Kim, and the oh-so-lovely Gracerina are coming to town! JimA and Dani--Melissa sez that she will bring her book on immunizations, and they think it would be a swell thing for these two little urchins to meet for a spell.

Peace OUT.

It looks like the start of a movement.


I gotta say that I really enjoyed watching Trek last night. I don't have any real additions to put on the reviews that have already been laid down. I think it could be hard for this show to have any legs (other than those of that foxey Vulcan), as the characters don't present anything really compelling. I barely remember the captain's name (Archer, I think...). I hope they find something else for the Asian translator woman to do besides scream in terror.

Cool links, Ned. I think the concept of consequences for behavior presents me with no small amount of consternation. I support them entirely, but I always feel that consequences that occur "naturally" seem to me the most effective. If I drink too much on Friday, I am hungover Saturday. Unfortunately, there are plenty of times when I need to impose applied or articificial consequences. That means that I have to work really hard to figure out if the consequences I devise are meaningful and truly address the behavior at hand. That can be a real pain in the booty, as no behavior occurs in a vacuum. And Sonya is right--what I do (or what we do as collective entities) is not the sole factor in determining the course of an individual's or group's actions. That means I have to work doubly hard to figure out what else, besides me, is fucking things up. It's enough to make a guy go batty. Bottom line is, I don't have any real answers beyond my hope for peaceful solutions and personal (or national) accountability. I hope I have not come across as sounding like I have more than that.

I recognize the concern about self-defense; I would like to believe that if someone were trying to seriously injure or kill Jennifer, Gracie, et al, that I would exhaust all options to save them, even violence. Even violence that resulted in the attacker's death. However, I don't see the current situation to be analogous. I don't think we a currently "in danger" as I write this; in fact, I would imagine that this nation is probably safer than it has been in some years. And I clearly do not believe violence in this situation is anything like stopping an intruder in one's home. What I do believe is that a violent military response, especially a protracted one that increases the degree and duration of the US military presence in Arab lands, will put us at greater peril. A bunch of people had to be pretty hopping mad at the US in order to plan and carry those attacks. If we respond in kind, I think it is reasonable to assume that whoever was angry will still be angry. I would like to reduce the level of anger, not increase it.

Here's a metaphor that I have been using:

Let's say that a student cuts me with a knife tomorrow during class. I have to get stitches, but I will be all right. I have all sorts of options about what I can do with him, up to and including expulsion (read: execution). If I choose expulsion, I will have sent a strong message to the other students, and I will no longer risk injury from that student. But I have done nothing to really solve the problem. If I really want to solve the problem, I have to ask myself what I have done to create a classroom where one my students thinks that this the only way he can be heard. All behavior is communication. Violence is communication--it says that one has exhausted all other possibilities. It is, in fact, a cry for help. If I respond with "violence," in this case expulsion, I am also crying for help. What I need to do is to CHANGE what I am doing in the classroom. If I don't, one of the remaining students will eventually cry for help. It may not happen for a while, and it may not be with a knife, but it WILL happen. Why? Because they know that their teacher, someone they desperately want to trust, cannot be trusted with the power he wields. That is truly terrorizing.

And a true story…

The boys down the street have been fun and challenging recently. They love to come down and work and play with us. Their father is not very involved in their life (or mom's), so I think they relish both a positive male role (from ME? Hard to believe…) and a couple that treats each other with respect. Since the attacks, they have come down with army clothes and pop guns, model jet fighters and flags. It can be quite interesting to talk to them about flag waving or "bad guys." The youngest, Bill, excitedly called me out the other afternoon. "Jim! Jim!"
"What's goin' on?"
"I threw these rotten apples at the dog next door! They were smashing all over the place! Now that dog is really mad!" The neighbors have a fairly large dog. I don't know what breed it is, or what it looks like. They keep it leashed to the side-view mirror on their car all the time, and it lies below the hedge that separates our yards. I have been kept up plenty of nights by its incessant barking.
"Wait a minute," I say. "You said you were throwing apples at the dog?"
"Yeah, and he-"
"Whoa! Why are you throwing apples at the dog?"
"Coz he's mean."
"Ok. Bill, can I ask you a question?" At this point, Bill is ready to go, as he realizes that I am not going to play along with him. His eyes bounce down the street, looking for a legitimate distraction.
"Bill-Look at me."
"What." Petulantly.
"Do you think that dog will stop being mean because you throw apples at it?"
"No."
"Is that dog still tied up?"
"Yes."
"Is anybody forcing you to go near that dog?"
"No-o." Pretty much ready to be done with this conversation.
"Listen. What do I want you to promise me right now?"
"What? I don't know."
"Yes, you do. About the mean dog."
"Ok. I won't throw apples at it anymore."
"Why not?
"Because it's not nice?" He asks, instead of states, but I am satisfied anyway.
"That's right. Is that all you wanted to talk about?"
"Yeah." He pauses, about to go away, the something new hits him. "Are you and Jennifer gonna play darts tonight coz if ya are can I play too?"
"Maybe. See ya later."